Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Another Evaluation, More Bad News


 I wish that just once, Bella could get an evaluation where we got some good news back, but alas, that has yet to happen. I mentioned a couple of weeks ago that Bella was in line to get evaluated to see if she qualified for Occupational and Physical Therapy… I got the results in the mail yesterday.

It was a lot of what I already expected. Bella made limited eye contact, was unable to follow simple directions or two part instructions and was very quick to move from one area to another. Due to the fact that they pulled her from her classroom, it also took her a little bit to readjust to a new routine.

What I didn’t expect to find out was that she has the overall motor skills of an 18-month old. The evaluators also noticed that she has a bilateral deformity that could explain her difficulty with balance and coordination. She has a condition called “Genu valgum”, commonly called "knock-knees”. Her knees touch, but her lower legs angle outwards and her feet don’t come together. It’s quite common in developing children, but she also has hyperextension of the knees and bilateral flat feet. All that together means that she has issues with the construction of her lower legs. We were told to wait a bit before seeking any kind of treatment since sometimes, children will grow out of it...unfortunately, with all of those issues presenting at the same time, there is a pretty high chance that Bella will have to get treated with braces, orthopedic shoes, surgery or, worst case, all three. We’d noticed more and more around home that she was losing her balance more easily and even though she loves to run, that she’d stop after short distances. Never did I expect that there could actually be something wrong with her legs, I just thought that it was all part of the package.

An example of Genu Valgum, also known as "knocked knees". 

Hypertension of the knee, also known as "swayback knees"


Even with all that, they couldn’t help but mention in her eval what a happy, sweet child she was. She smiled the entire time, expect when they administered tests that clearly put pressure on her lower legs and seemed to cause her a little bit of pain. She was chatty and vocal and really enjoyed the fine motor skills tests. She loved the music they played and enjoyed the “dancing test”.
Despite all her issues, she's a loving, happy little girl.


They did, however, also mention that she would “protest” when they tried to get her to switch from one test to another. She would drop to the ground and refuse to get up. We see that a lot at home, but she recovered quickly.

Her sensory integration was tested and she scored in the lowest percentile. Also expected, but still rather shocking to see in writing.

Bella is gradually slipping from the higher level of functioning autism, to the more moderately effected.

Sometimes, I can’t help but get a little worn from all of this. We feel like we’re doing everything we can, but we just keep getting bad news. Regardless, I won’t give up doing whatever needs to be done.

One piece of good news that did come from all of this is the fact that despite all her other issues, Bella is very intelligent. They noted that she was putting together puzzles very quickly and her affinity for music is a great sign that we’ll be able to get her focused on something later on. Having something for her to do that she’s good at can only go to help her self-esteem.

We’re in the process now of figuring out what more we can do at home that will help improve some of her lower scoring areas...


Sunday, August 19, 2012

She'll Never Talk To Me


"She’ll Never Talk to Me"...

This was something that Rayne said to me recently that took me a little by surprise and really hit me hard. I was sitting there, watching them play together, Rayne being the only child that Bella actually playfully interacts with. Rayne would twirl, Bella would follow. Rayne would say something and Bella would repeat the tone of her voice, but not the words. This is what happened next:

Rayne: Bella sit down.
(She did)
Rayne: Okay, Bella. Say “Spongebob”.
(Bella smiled but didn’t say anything)
Rayne: Say “Spongebob Squarepants”.
(Bella squealed, happily, but still didn’t say it.

Rayne then looks right at me and says “She’s never going to talk to me is she?”

The look of sadness on her face crushed me. All Rayne ever asks of Bella is for her to talk to her. She actually asked for this for Christmas last year. She loves her sister and you can tell when you see them together. I try to explain it to Rayne the best I can, but she just can’t understand it yet.

At a recent evaluation that Bella had at school, I was told that based on her vocal tone and the way that she sounds when she does say words, it’s quite possible that she’ll never really “talk”. At this point in time, Bella has never spoken on her own. She has repeated very few words that she’s heard and she’ll mimic sounds, but she’s never used purposeful speech.

Rayne seems to accept that, for now, Bella isn’t going to talk. They’ve created their own way of communicating. Hand gestures mostly... their own form of sign language, which is amazing to see.

If I could say anything to parents out there it would be talk to your kids. Really talk to them. Listen to them when they talk to you.

Even after the ten thousandth game of 21 questions.

Even when they're doing that thing when they ask "why" after everything you say.

Even when your child is going on and on.

It’s sometimes easy to take simple things like a long winded story about princesses and frogs or dragons for granted.

My daughter may never talk to me.

...and even with all the other issues we deal with, it hurts almost more than anything else.


I'd like to think that Bella will always have her sister (and brother and new sister/brother) there for her. Siblings are built in friends... at least, after a certain time in your life.