"She’ll Never Talk to Me"...
This was something that Rayne said to me recently that took me a little by surprise and really hit me hard. I was sitting there, watching them play together, Rayne being the only child that Bella actually playfully interacts with. Rayne would twirl, Bella would follow. Rayne would say something and Bella would repeat the tone of her voice, but not the words. This is what happened next:
Rayne: Bella sit down.
(She did)
Rayne: Okay, Bella. Say “Spongebob”.
(Bella smiled but didn’t say anything)
Rayne: Say “Spongebob Squarepants”.
(Bella squealed, happily, but still didn’t say it.
Rayne then looks right at me and says “She’s never going to talk to me is she?”
The look of sadness on her face crushed me. All Rayne ever asks of Bella is for her to talk to her. She actually asked for this for Christmas last year. She loves her sister and you can tell when you see them together. I try to explain it to Rayne the best I can, but she just can’t understand it yet.
At a recent evaluation that Bella had at school, I was told that based on her vocal tone and the way that she sounds when she does say words, it’s quite possible that she’ll never really “talk”. At this point in time, Bella has never spoken on her own. She has repeated very few words that she’s heard and she’ll mimic sounds, but she’s never used purposeful speech.
Rayne seems to accept that, for now, Bella isn’t going to talk. They’ve created their own way of communicating. Hand gestures mostly... their own form of sign language, which is amazing to see.
If I could say anything to parents out there it would be talk to your kids. Really talk to them. Listen to them when they talk to you.
Even after the ten thousandth game of 21 questions.
Even when they're doing that thing when they ask "why" after everything you say.
Even when your child is going on and on.
It’s sometimes easy to take simple things like a long winded story about princesses and frogs or dragons for granted.
My daughter may never talk to me.
...and even with all the other issues we deal with, it hurts almost more than anything else.
I'd like to think that Bella will always have her sister (and brother and new sister/brother) there for her. Siblings are built in friends... at least, after a certain time in your life.
