There are a lot of things that we’re facing right now that never occurred to us until just recently. One of those things I just wrote about. Our issues with the school bus. There are things that we worry about for the future, that we can conveniently put off for now. Things like, puberty and how she’ll handle attention from boys. What are we going to do when she turns 16 and wants a license… can she even have a license? I know that my daughter will do wonderful things with her life, I just don’t know what they’ll be.
Right now, however, there are more pressing issues. Like, how the hell are we going to potty train her. Seriously, we didn’t even think about this until a couple of weeks ago.
Sitting in the safe room, just hanging out. I go to the diaper cart to grab the baby a diaper. In the two and a half minutes I was gone, Bella managed to undress, remove her diaper and create a pee puddle on the carpet. I put a new diaper on, redressed her and then I “Resolved” the carpet. About two hours later, I found myself scrubbing the carpet again.
Then it dawned on me. How am I going to potty train this kid?
A few days after the carpet scrubbing incident, I attempted to put her on the potty. The little kid potty didn’t work out since all she wanted to do was take it apart (no worries, it was brand new and had never been used). She REFUSED to sit on it, even in her diaper. So, we thought, “hey, maybe she’ll just skip the little potty and use the big one.” Well, the second I put her on it, she flipped out. She didn’t like the cold of the seat or the fact that her feet were off the floor. I stopped, waited for her to calm down and decided to show her what it was all about. When I flushed the toilet, she had a Class 5 Meltdown. I felt horrible, but I didn’t know.
I probably should have.
The sound was way too overwhelming.
She has been terrified of the bathroom since. We have to give her baths in the other bathroom, she makes sure the door is closed at all times. She avoids walking past that doorway…
I’m pretty sure that I have traumatized her.
I tried to do some research on this, but I couldn’t find a lot of info. I spoke to some parents on the message boards and chat rooms I frequent, but they either didn’t want to talk about potty issues or they didn’t have a hard time when it came to potty training their kids. Good for them, and I mean that honestly. All the info I did find, said “steady routine, repeat often”. Meaning, make a potty routine, repeat the steps often and ask them constantly if they have to go potty. Bella’s specific issues make it hard. She is unable to follow specific directions or comprehend instruction.
Bella is showing all the typical signs of a toddler that’s ready to potty train. She has all the cues we, as parents, are told to look for. She’s at the right age to start training and she obviously hates being wet. Most of the time, she removes her diaper BEFORE she actually goes potty. Lucky for me and my bottle of carpet cleaner.
It makes me wonder if this is something that will get easier, something that she’ll “teach” herself. Or something that I have totally derailed by scaring her with the toilet.
How do you teach a non-verbal autistic child to use the potty, when they don’t comprehend what any of it means. When the sound of the toilet scares them.
There are a lot of things we are learning as we go. This is definitely one of them. We’re open to any and all suggestions and advice. After all, this is what I started this blog for.
Anyone?
